[No text, just a picture of Kon, clearly fresh out of the baths, with a towel loosely belted around his waist as he looks up towards the camera with a grin that one might describe as 'suggestive'.]
AND OK, IN CHAPTER 5 - OSKAR SAVES GUINEVERE FROM BANDITS ON THE AMBER ROAD. But one of the bandits escape with all of Guinevere's things. They have a fight. And she's all muddy and dirty. Like my friend Caleb.
SO THEN SHE GOES AND TAKES A BATH IN A NEARBY STREAM.
[Oh, Jester, if only you could see the grin on his face right now. But the weird thing is, he doesn't text back. There's not even the little '...' of someone typing, there's just nothing ...
Until she hears a knock, knock, knock on her door.]
[He's got nothing to be ashamed of and it's late enough that everyone's either asleep or otherwise occupied, so ... why not give Jester a little wish fulfillment? He'll even sell it too, reaching out to cup her cheeks in his hands, softly sighing.]
Guinevere.
[Then, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her lips and sliding one hand away from her to tug the door shut behind him.]
[ it's not like they were particularly far apart, room wise. conner's never really seen jester blush or be embarrassed really. It's normally Jester that does the embarrassing. The one time when Conner grabbed her ass, and she practically came - sure. But this is something else. This is full on, blushing purple up to the ears - embarrassment.
Okay. This might have been a really bad kink. OH NO. Does she want to admit that?
She has a moment of choice paralysis, it takes a moment but --
Fuck it. She's going to go for it! ]
The bandits have stolen all our clothes.
[ yeah, that's her first line. SHE'S NOT EVEN GOOD AT THIS. DOWNRIGHT TERRIBLE. ]
[Oh, they're committing to this? That's ... He thought he was gonna get away with just the opening line, and he wasn't really prepared for more than that.
[But just look at her. She is so excited about this, and even if it is not his thing -- or at least it's never been his thing, so who knows -- he doesn't really have the heart to pump the breaks.
[So guess he's going for it too ...?]
I--
[He starts in his own voice but stops. What the hell does an orc sound like? After a second or two, apparently he decides on deep because when he speaks his voice has dropped an octave or two.]
We'll find them, Gwen. Don't you worry ...
[Shit. Shit it's so hard not to laugh, what is he doing]
[ There's a pang in her gut. The voice change is familiar, but right now - she's swallowing that emotion like a shot of sugar syrup they serve with the coffee. Like she's swallowing the sea and the smell of Port Damali. But it's wrong. It's not -- It's not Fjord. Not really. Don't. Don't think about it Jester. Don't think about it Jester. She reprimands herself for a quick second before she manages to get back into character. She'll try to pass of it as that. A shift in character.
She's a good, startlingly good actor. Her lines are delivered near flawlessly, the barest hint of her Nicodranas inflection coating her words - but its' Gwen now. ]
There are more pressing things we have to take care of, Oskar.
[ she says almost breathily. ]
I want you to push me up against this tree and ravish me.
[Yyyyyep. But they've got walls. Walls work too, right?
[Here's hoping, because he takes a step forward, gently guiding her back against the cool stone.]
It's all I've been thinking about, Gwen. Ever since we've been travelling together ...
[His lines are delivered ... less well, but he's trying. He feels absolutely ridiculous, but he's doing what he can for her.
[Still ... he's not doing too badly. The words might be a little bit stiff, the accent's probably completely wrong, but the body language is there. His touch is loving and tender, there's warmth in his eyes ... one of the hands cradling her face shifts so that he can softly stroke her hair as he continues:]
I ... [Wait. What was the plot here again? Something about -- Oh! Right, okay, Romeo and Juliet written by Kathleen Woodiwiss, he can work with that.] I know your family will never accept me, but out here ... out here it's just us. Me and you ...
[He's pretty sure he lost it for like, a half a second somewhere in there, but whatever. The show must go on, so he sloooowly starts to lean in for that big, romantic kiss.]
[ Jester hasnโt read Romeo and Juliet, but if Kon were to give it to her - she would be moved. Give her some Austen and this girl will be eating out of the palm of your hand. She leans into the touch, nuzzling his palm. She could play demure, human and someone entirely Un-Jester. Sorry to break it to you, Fjord - Gwen was pretty much the Anastasia Steele of Exandria. ]
Our love is forbidden. [ Sheโs trying to be serious. Sheโs mostly just caught in ... bad dialogue. ] But I want you like...
[ she blanks for a moment trying to remember? What was that line? ]
Like ummm..
[ oh yeah sheโs got it. ]
The sun needs a reason to shine. [ FUCK YEAH. SHE BEAMS HAPPY SHE REMEMBERED THAT. ]
[You ever have those moments ... where like, you're trying your hardest not to laugh and, because you're holding it in, the littlest thing is enough to set you off?
[Yeah, seeing her momentary break puts him over the edge and he lets out a long, sputtering laugh and leans over her to rest his head against the wall behind her.]
Fuck. [Both his head and shoulders are shaking - one because he's disappointed in himself for fucking it up, and the other because he's still not quite able to stop laughing just yet.] Shit, I'm sorry.
] Him laughing โ it canโt help but trigger her own laughter as well. She does lean back against the wall and wrap her arms around Kon, pulling him closer to a kiss. Itโs definitely an โI forgive you, kissโ. ]
[He's glad she's laughing too, because look at the apologetic smile on his face right before she kisses him, and she'll see that he feels genuinely bad about breaking like that. It makes him feel a little better about enjoying the 'i forgive you' kiss quite as much as he does - though frankly he enjoys that wicked little grin spreading across her lips when she pulls back even more.]
[His eyebrows arch up in mock surprise before sloooowly pulling into a grin that's every bit as lascivious.]
Hmm ... well, I was gonna say I could still try again if you wanted, but now I'm curious what you had in mind ...
You werenโt having fun? [ she pouts. But she does lean in to steal another smooch. ]
I always have fun with you, Kon. Itโs why I like you a lot. [ she says matter of fact-ly, like duh - Kon donโt be silly. ]
We should do some of your other.kinks too. I can pretend to be an even villain who turns into donuts and steals a lot of money. And then you can catch me! And be like โOH NO DONUT GIRL IS IN MY GRASPSโ and then I will be like, โOH NO. SUPERBOY. I CANNOT TELL WHO YOU ARE WITH YOUR INCREDIBLE COSTUMEโ
Me too. [ She pulls him into a tight hug and because she's extraordinarily bad about talking or coping with her own feelings. ] I like Conner for just Conner. [ like it's that simple. ]
Honestly ... the orc voice you did was weirding me out a little. [ she confesses. Out of all the Mighty Nein she's mentioned extensively - the stories she's told Kon - except for any involving Fjord. It was silly. And she herself doesn't know why she hasn't mentioned it. ]
You sounded like this boy I really like. [ a beat. ] He's part of the Mighty Nein, too. Like me and Molly. His name is Fjord and he's going to a really great mage one day. He was a sailor in Port Damali. He went adventuring me when I had no one else.
[ she shakes her head. ]
Anyway, but Fjord is Fjord. And you're different. And it's not fair for me to ask you to do that voice.
Oh. [A beat.] Oh, shit, Jester, I'm ... I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to ...
[It's pretty clear in his tone that he's not feeling any kind of personal affront - like he doesn't suddenly feel like he's playing stand-in or anything like that. He just feels bad that he's suddenly churned up a whole ton of complicated feelings and dumped them square in her lap.]
I'm okay! [ because she's Jester and she's always okay.
She's going to take the moment to try to drag Kon on the bed. Moving the plate of donuts (now stale) to the side of her bedside along with some art stuff. She flops down on her bed and pats the space next to her. ]
Don't worry about it! Let's get back to making out, yeah?
[He chuckles, leaning down over her and pressing a kiss over the flat of her stomach. He shifts forward, the front of his body slowly gliding over hers. He plants another kiss between her breasts and under her chin before he kisses her. It's gentle, lingering, but ultimately a quick little one he leans back just a little.]
Trust me, Jester, I like you just fine the way that you are.
[ she insists before dipping down and leaning into that kiss. Kissing Conner was always pleasant - just easy and sometimes - it was an anchor to all the chaos of this realm. ]
[Seems to kinda defeat the point, but Jester's determined so he just sighs again.]
Knockout. Her name was Knockout.
[He's just gonna ... roll off of her for a second and lie down on the bed next to her.]
She came from a really, really shitty place, and because I was young and stupid and she was hot as hell, I didn't notice she was actually a really, really shitty person too.
[He briefly remembers Kara yelling in his face about him running around with Knockout. Telling him he doesn't deserve to wear the 'S'.]
[ she crawls on top of him and pulls him into the tightest hug and presses a gentle kiss on Conner's forehead. ]
It's okay. Now you have ... [ she pauses to try to think of a really cool superhero name, and when she fails she just goes. ] Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire and she's sometimes an asshole but she can be a really nice person too.
[ going to lean in and give him a smooch, softly she adds: ]
[He smiles, appreciating the kiss, the intimacy, the whole ... Jesterness of the situation.
[She makes it real hard to be upset, is what he's getting at here.]
You're welcome. It's just, y'know ... not my favorite thing in the world to talk about.
[Nobody's really fond of remembering when they got played like an absolute sucker. Especially not when everyone around them knew it and they were too stubborn to listen, and it put some dents in your family relationships, and --
[You get the gist.]
Besides, I like Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire way better.
[There are his hands, ghosting up her sides, fingers interlinking across the small of her back.]
Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire never punched me in the freaking face.
[ she grins and just climbs into his lap and settle comfortable there, so she's sitting on conner. she moves her hands to card through his hair, gentle in her mannerisms. ]
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This is like that scene in chapter 5 of Tusk Love!
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[1/???]
It's about this beautiful merchant's daughter. Her name is Guinevere. And Guinever gets saved by
[2/???]
[3/???]
SO THEN SHE GOES AND TAKES A BATH IN A NEARBY STREAM.
AND THEN OSKAR COMES IN NAKED!!!
[4/4]
[ and to which she sends a playfully cropped nude of her sitting on her bed eating a donut. ]
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And it rendered me speechless two. YOU KNOW?? HOW CAN TWO PEOPLE JUST LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH?
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Um. Anyway! Why did you send me such a scandalous picture? ARE YOU LOOKING TO GET LAIIIIDDDDD?
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Until she hears a knock, knock, knock on her door.]
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Oskar. [ she throws her head back, over dramatically. ]
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[He's got nothing to be ashamed of and it's late enough that everyone's either asleep or otherwise occupied, so ... why not give Jester a little wish fulfillment? He'll even sell it too, reaching out to cup her cheeks in his hands, softly sighing.]
Guinevere.
[Then, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her lips and sliding one hand away from her to tug the door shut behind him.]
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Okay. This might have been a really bad kink. OH NO. Does she want to admit that?
She has a moment of choice paralysis, it takes a moment but --
Fuck it. She's going to go for it! ]
The bandits have stolen all our clothes.
[ yeah, that's her first line. SHE'S NOT EVEN GOOD AT THIS. DOWNRIGHT TERRIBLE. ]
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[But just look at her. She is so excited about this, and even if it is not his thing -- or at least it's never been his thing, so who knows -- he doesn't really have the heart to pump the breaks.
[So guess he's going for it too ...?]
I--
[He starts in his own voice but stops. What the hell does an orc sound like? After a second or two, apparently he decides on deep because when he speaks his voice has dropped an octave or two.]
We'll find them, Gwen. Don't you worry ...
[Shit. Shit it's so hard not to laugh, what is he doing]
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She's a good, startlingly good actor. Her lines are delivered near flawlessly, the barest hint of her Nicodranas inflection coating her words - but its' Gwen now. ]
There are more pressing things we have to take care of, Oskar.
[ she says almost breathily. ]
I want you to push me up against this tree and ravish me.
[ they were indoors. ]
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[Here's hoping, because he takes a step forward, gently guiding her back against the cool stone.]
It's all I've been thinking about, Gwen. Ever since we've been travelling together ...
[His lines are delivered ... less well, but he's trying. He feels absolutely ridiculous, but he's doing what he can for her.
[Still ... he's not doing too badly. The words might be a little bit stiff, the accent's probably completely wrong, but the body language is there. His touch is loving and tender, there's warmth in his eyes ... one of the hands cradling her face shifts so that he can softly stroke her hair as he continues:]
I ... [Wait. What was the plot here again? Something about -- Oh! Right, okay, Romeo and Juliet written by Kathleen Woodiwiss, he can work with that.] I know your family will never accept me, but out here ... out here it's just us. Me and you ...
[He's pretty sure he lost it for like, a half a second somewhere in there, but whatever. The show must go on, so he sloooowly starts to lean in for that big, romantic kiss.]
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OSKAR! We canโt.
[ Jester hasnโt read Romeo and Juliet, but if Kon were to give it to her - she would be moved. Give her some Austen and this girl will be eating out of the palm of your hand. She leans into the touch, nuzzling his palm. She could play demure, human and someone entirely Un-Jester. Sorry to break it to you, Fjord - Gwen was pretty much the Anastasia Steele of Exandria. ]
Our love is forbidden. [ Sheโs trying to be serious. Sheโs mostly just caught in ... bad dialogue. ] But I want you like...
[ she blanks for a moment trying to remember? What was that line? ]
Like ummm..
[ oh yeah sheโs got it. ]
The sun needs a reason to shine. [ FUCK YEAH. SHE BEAMS HAPPY SHE REMEMBERED THAT. ]
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[Yeah, seeing her momentary break puts him over the edge and he lets out a long, sputtering laugh and leans over her to rest his head against the wall behind her.]
Fuck. [Both his head and shoulders are shaking - one because he's disappointed in himself for fucking it up, and the other because he's still not quite able to stop laughing just yet.] Shit, I'm sorry.
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] Him laughing โ it canโt help but trigger her own laughter as well. She does lean back against the wall and wrap her arms around Kon, pulling him closer to a kiss. Itโs definitely an โI forgive you, kissโ. ]
Make it up to me?
[ she grins devilishly. ]
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[His eyebrows arch up in mock surprise before sloooowly pulling into a grin that's every bit as lascivious.]
Hmm ... well, I was gonna say I could still try again if you wanted, but now I'm curious what you had in mind ...
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Youโre open to restarting? Because Iโm a really really good actor.
[ guess who just rolled an 8 (natural 7 + 1 modifier) on her performance check. Also Jester has neveer been so determined. ]
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[He will try, but he just wants to stress that 'try' is the operative word here.]
I can't promise the same thing isn't gonna happen, but, y'know ... [He shrugs, that grin softening into a genuinely affectionate smile.]
You seemed like you were having fun.
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I always have fun with you, Kon. Itโs why I like you a lot. [ she says matter of fact-ly, like duh - Kon donโt be silly. ]
We should do some of your other.kinks too. I can pretend to be an even villain who turns into donuts and steals a lot of money. And then you can catch me! And be like โOH NO DONUT GIRL IS IN MY GRASPSโ and then I will be like, โOH NO. SUPERBOY. I CANNOT TELL WHO YOU ARE WITH YOUR INCREDIBLE COSTUMEโ
[ she fakes swoons. ]
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Trust me, I've done the whole 'shack up with the supervillain' thing and it is not great.
[His whole experience with Knockout's made him pretty darn sure that's not something he wants to give a second try. Besides ...
[He smiles, brushing a stray lock of hair out of her face with his thumb.]
I don't know ... call me crazy or whatever, but I kinda just like this.
[Because, honestly? She's fun, and funny, and it's impossible not to smile around her, and that's pretty fucking great.]
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Honestly ... the orc voice you did was weirding me out a little. [ she confesses. Out of all the Mighty Nein she's mentioned extensively - the stories she's told Kon - except for any involving Fjord. It was silly. And she herself doesn't know why she hasn't mentioned it. ]
You sounded like this boy I really like. [ a beat. ] He's part of the Mighty Nein, too. Like me and Molly. His name is Fjord and he's going to a really great mage one day. He was a sailor in Port Damali. He went adventuring me when I had no one else.
[ she shakes her head. ]
Anyway, but Fjord is Fjord. And you're different. And it's not fair for me to ask you to do that voice.
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[It's pretty clear in his tone that he's not feeling any kind of personal affront - like he doesn't suddenly feel like he's playing stand-in or anything like that. He just feels bad that he's suddenly churned up a whole ton of complicated feelings and dumped them square in her lap.]
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She's going to take the moment to try to drag Kon on the bed. Moving the plate of donuts (now stale) to the side of her bedside along with some art stuff. She flops down on her bed and pats the space next to her. ]
Don't worry about it! Let's get back to making out, yeah?
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I mean ... I'm very okay with that, but, uh ... you sure you're okay?
[He asks, head tilting slightly to one side. There's no pressure there, no force behind it ... he's just asking friend-to-friend, here.]
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[ she deadpans. ]
You should absolutely make out with me to see if I'm sure.
[ yup just gonna flooop on the bed. ]
And I'm not going to pretend to be super villain okay! You'd better like me more!
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Trust me, Jester, I like you just fine the way that you are.
[Thank fucking God she's not a supervillain.
[Then he kisses her like he means it.]
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[ she insists before dipping down and leaning into that kiss. Kissing Conner was always pleasant - just easy and sometimes - it was an anchor to all the chaos of this realm. ]
You're not getting away from that story!
[ she's determined, okay okay. ]
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Can't we just ... not? And keep making out?
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[ she's guessing this is how Caleb does it. STRAIGHT FROM THE WIDOGAST PLAYBOOK. ]
What's her nammmeeeee~?
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[Seems to kinda defeat the point, but Jester's determined so he just sighs again.]
Knockout. Her name was Knockout.
[He's just gonna ... roll off of her for a second and lie down on the bed next to her.]
She came from a really, really shitty place, and because I was young and stupid and she was hot as hell, I didn't notice she was actually a really, really shitty person too.
[He briefly remembers Kara yelling in his face about him running around with Knockout. Telling him he doesn't deserve to wear the 'S'.]
At least not for way too long.
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It's okay. Now you have ... [ she pauses to try to think of a really cool superhero name, and when she fails she just goes. ] Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire and she's sometimes an asshole but she can be a really nice person too.
[ going to lean in and give him a smooch, softly she adds: ]
Thanks for telling me though.
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[She makes it real hard to be upset, is what he's getting at here.]
You're welcome. It's just, y'know ... not my favorite thing in the world to talk about.
[Nobody's really fond of remembering when they got played like an absolute sucker. Especially not when everyone around them knew it and they were too stubborn to listen, and it put some dents in your family relationships, and --
[You get the gist.]
Besides, I like Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire way better.
[There are his hands, ghosting up her sides, fingers interlinking across the small of her back.]
Lady Fancypants McGee, Esquire never punched me in the freaking face.
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[ she grins and just climbs into his lap and settle comfortable there, so she's sitting on conner. she moves her hands to card through his hair, gentle in her mannerisms. ]
How do you want to do this?
[ she teases.. ]
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I thought I was making it up to you for breaking character ...